Rejected lately?

Have you ever experienced rejection, or should I say, repeated rejection? Like when you're on the basketball court and that really big guy continually swats your shot away? Ok, maybe that's just with short people like me. What about the girl you finally build up the courage to ask out and then you go for it and put yourself out there and she says no. And not just "no", but an emphatic "Yeah. No.".

Rejection sucks. No matter what type. It seems to just penetrate to the core of us. 

Back when we lived in Singapore, I had worked really hard at attaining “official status” in the country with work and visas. However, when the third rejection came from the government on our visas, we had to find a different solution. The rejection was not only confusing but it hurt. Then there was the time when my kids said, “we don’t need your help Daddy!” This rejection was weirdly both deflating and uplifting. Also, there was our move back to the states where I kept trying to get a job. In fact, I filled out 120 applications and not a single one panned out. Ouch! 

These rejections, to name but a few, seemed to cut to the core of my being - the reserve tank of optimism. At least, that's what I thought and how it felt. 

During  the season of Lent, thousands upon thousands of Jesus followers throughout the globe take time this year annually to spend time focusing on repentance, self-denial and the cost of following

Jesus. We reflect deeply on the life, death, and resurrection of Christ and the grave implications for our lives. We hope to become less so that Christ becomes more. We could even go as far as to say that we pay strict attention to creating space so that, Now, with God’s help, I shall become myself (Soren Kierkegaard). 

If this is true, becoming myself then most likely includes rejection and even disappointment. Because what becoming doesn't have setbacks or failures? However, could it also be said, that in becoming, hope is  birthed in the midst of rejection and disappointment as well? Maybe this is one of the great tensions we as humans face in become more fully ourselves - more fully human, more fully into our created image, into the imago dei (Image of God). Maybe a great struggle we face daily in the here and now, is between disappointment and hope.

I think John Ortberg says it best. The word [disappointment] itself is apt: I am in a state of dis-appointment. I am missing the life I was appointed by God to live - missing my calling. And I have dis-appointed God. I have removed him from the central role he longs to play in my life; I have refused to “let God be God” and have appointed myself in his place.

Oftentimes our initial mechanizm to deal with rejection - not to mention the other areas of our lives we’re too prideful to let God be God and assume that I’ve got this, - is to try and name ourselves as god. Just as it was in the Genesis garden narrative. It might be said, that Adam and Eve ate of the fruit because they wanted to be God instead of simply being godly. They tried to usurp God’s place and assume God’s role.

Yet, right here in the midst of our turmoil or prideful ignorance, God is here with us, just as he was for the first humans who dis-appointed God in the garden. In the light of the resurrection, we can’t help but believe that Christ has come close to us in, and because, of love. He comes as God did in the garden, gently and simply asking, where are you? The truth for believers is, that there is great optimistic hope in such a simple question. Optimism without Hope is just positive thinking and as Jesus believers we’re not just optimistic. But we’re ones filled with hope. Hope that the world is God’s and everything in it (including us) and that God has good and beautiful plans for it (including us). Specifically, that there is a hope of receiving our true calling - becoming myself - becoming our true selves in Jesus!

We can become our true selves even in the here and now tension between rejection and hope. While we may continue to experience rejection and struggle with dis-appointment, we know confidently in faith, the great truth: that Jesus who was ultimately rejected, even on the cross, has journeyed through death and enters into solidarity with us, emphatically choosing us all as His beloved.

So, if you're experiencing and/or experienced rejection, turn to the one whom will never reject anyone who seeks. In fact, if we "seek Him, we will find Him"! This is honestly, what matters most in life - HIM. Sure, we have goals in our lives as spouses, parents, children, friends, in the marketplace, or even as believers in Jesus. But our ultimate goal however, is that we become more and more like Him - which just might be, more our true selves!

So take time to slow down during Lent and intentionally seek space to allow God to help you break unhealthy habits of dis-appointment, and instead fill them with a new healthy one of living in extravagant optimistic Hope. Let this be one of your unhurried rhythms of grace - as beloved Sons and Daughters adopted, not rejected, in Christ.